提出可实时优化的乘车匹配延迟控制框架，提升乘客司机体验。

In large-scale ride-hailing, hold control is a critical mechanism for improving passenger-driver experience. By selectively delaying certain driver-order pairs, the system waits for better opportunities, reduces cancellations, and mitigates wasted driver effort. However, existing industrial hold strategies often rely on heuristic thresholding over multiple predictive models, which can be brittle under non-stationary traffic and hard to optimize for multi-objective experience signals. We propose EXHOLD, a deployable two-stage framework decoupling experience-aware pair assessment from hold-time execution. In Stage I, we learn a decision model assigning each driver-order pair to discrete, interpretable experience tiers by optimizing a unified objective that aggregates satisfaction signals across the matching funnel. In Stage II, we solve for a monotone hold-time schedule via constrained optimization over empirical quantiles. This explicitly enforces service guardrails bounding the unnecessary holding of promising matches while maximizing overall experience improvement. We evaluate EXHOLD through randomized A/B experiments in DiDi's production system in Brazil. Results show consistent gains in marketplace efficiency and experience: EXHOLD increases trip completion and driver income, significantly reduces passenger cancellations, and improves funnel efficiency. Ablations and behavioral analyses confirm both stages are essential and that the policy makes calibrated decisions under spatiotemporal heterogeneity. EXHOLD is currently deployed, serving production traffic in Brazil.